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appreciation

Happy Mother’s Day!

Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms, moms-to-be, mother-in-laws, step-moms, grandmothers and great-grandmas, to those celebrating their first or their fifty-first, to those with mommies in heaven and to those with babies/children in heaven, to those who nurture animals, plants, & adults, and to all those who play a motherly role like teachers, nurses, & doctors! And especially to those who have been struggling, waiting, and hoping to be a mom. You’re all amazing women! Appreciate the day for what it is worth. My love, my hope, my heart goes out to all of you today.

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Don’t Ignore The Power You Have to Influence Our Government!

So, on Wednesday, at the crack of dawn, I took a plane to Washington D.C. to attend Advocacy Day, brimming with excitement the entire flight to be a part of the day! I have always talked about how the government should get more involved with our plights, I even wrote about it in my memoir. Advocacy Day was my chance to actually get involved, walk the massive halls of our congressmen and speak to the people who help make change happen on Capital Hill.

When I came into the room, I was immediately in awe of how many people came, all for one purpose, all for one passion. However infertility effected each person, we were all on a mission. Perhaps we were speaking for ourselves, speaking for a family member, or for the entire community of 7.3 million who can’t afford IVF treatments or adoptions. We were brave, bold, and ready to get more support on the Family Act and the Adoption Tax Credit. I even had the pleasure of meeting infertility advocate Keiko Zoll who writes The Infertility Voice and Fran Meadows, author of The Truth Behind The Secret “Infertility.”

I met with my NY crew (joined by the amazing Risa Levine) where we discussed our meetings. Then, we walked to the Senate buildings to talk with the staff at Chuck Schumer’s office. I was proud of each and every one of us in that room. We spoke up and made sure she knew why infertility should not be ignored. Later, accompanied by Shelly Galvin, from Attain Fertility, we walked across the path in front of the Capital Building and headed to the buildings for our meetings with our NY congressmen. Some, we didn’t have a meeting with, but we made sure to stop at each office we were assigned and give them critical information on each bill.

Later, we met with a staffer at Kirsten Gillibrand’s office. On behalf of the group, and the entire infertility community, I thanked her for her sponsorship on the Family Act (an amazing piece of legislation that will help pay out of pocket expenses for IVF for those who really need it). We talked with her to find out what else we can do to get support. One of her answers: Write letters! And finally, I gave her a copy of my book to give to Senator Gillibrand as a special thank you with the hope that she will continue to be empowered by those effected with infertility.

Overall, it was an amazing day filled with pride to be an infertility advocate and an American. My only regret was not wearing shoes that were more broken in. There was so much walking, I actually had blisters on my feet at the end of the day. But it doesn’t compare to the blisters on many hearts that can’t afford infertility treatments or adoptions. So, I was out there for all of you. I was your voice. But now, you can make your own voice heard by calling and writing letters to your Senators and Representatives. Go to Resolve’s Activist Toolkit to learn more! One staff person told us there are over 4,000 bills and many aren’t even sponsored unless they hear from those who really care about it. So, do your part! Don’t ignore the power you have to make change!

  • http://www.resolve.org/infertility101 (Basic understanding of the disease of infertility.)
  • http://www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/about.html (About NIAW)
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    Lots of Love to Go Around!

    Here’s my Blog Love post to all of you! You are strong, bold and beautiful. Keep smiling, keep reading…Thank you for stopping by! I love you!

    Tomorrow is the big day for love and affection…and well, you may not be feeling in the loving mood this year. Perhaps your infertility has robbed you of that ultra sexy feeling because there’s been way too much pressure in the bedroom. Maybe money has been tight because of treatments or adoption preparations and with money stress comes every day stress and nit-picky fights. Infertility has the power to take over our lives and change relationships we have with others. But, it should never take away all you have left in the love department. Here are some simple ways to spread some love tomorrow and anytime, (even if there’s not a lot of money to go around). Remember, love is always FREE!

    • First, love thyself. Need a good pampering? Go ahead and splurge a little on something you’ve been wanting for a while now. Money tight? There’s plenty to do on a shoe-string budget from home spa treatments to taking a leisurely stroll during a ‘mental health day/hour off.’
    • Love thy neighbor. Your neighbors and friends may not be able to relate to your infertility, but they mean well. Keep them at arm’s length but pull them in to be your shoulder to cry on when you need it most. Showing this vulnerability will not only show them you are in need, it flexes their friendship muscle and helps you see who’s truly on your side. Include them in some Valentine’s Day or anytime love by giving a card, a heart box of chocolaty goodness or a simple thank you to show how appreciative you are.
    • Love thy spouse/partner. Remind him/her that you really do love and appreciate all that he/she does for you. Sometimes, it may be hard to rekindle some romance but some soft music, candle-light and a nice home cooked meal can go a long way. If you’re feeling creative; a poem, a scrapbook/slide-show, a special song or even a dedicated blog post can erupt a sea of emotions. Before I was married and totally broke, I once made my husband a painting with swirls of red paint and used Chinese characters that meant love, loyalty and devotion, among others. He loved it and it still sits by his night table! ;-)

    Happy Valentine’s Day!

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    Creme de Le Creme and The New Year

    Before we begin here, have you heard about my InJewels giveaway? It ends December 31st! :-)  


    Creme

     
      Have you heard about Stirrup Queens’ Creme de le Creme list that goes up every January for the past 6 years? Basically, she wants you to pick your very best post of 2011 and submit it here and that’s it, you’ll be on this amazing list. It’s for anyone in the ALI community who writes a blog (even if it’s a pretty new one)! How awesome is that? I am a bit out of the loop so the deadline to be on the list by January 1st was December 15th….but you can still submit until January 5th to be on the list, it just may be a little while. Also, there’s a whole bunch of cool prizes you can win! I just chose the post I thought was my best in 2011 and submitted it. Now, it’s your turn! Take a look through your archives, don’t be shy, and put yourself out there! Oh, and read the Creme de le Creme post to learn more about it!

    And after reflection on the past year, we’re about to start a brand new one! So…

    Happy New Year!

    *Whether you get all glammed up, go out and party like a rock star until midnight, or get jammied up, stay in and cozy up to the one you love while you count down the night–>make it magical.

         There’s something to be said about New Year’s Eve around the world. It’s the one day when you can reflect on the past year and look forward to a new beginning. It’s like starting all over with endless possibilities! So, dream the night away and toast to peace, love and happiness in 2012. Cheers!

    *recycled from a past post 
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    Test Tubes And Testosterone ~ A Review

      I just finished Michael Saunders’ memoir Test Tubes And Testosterone A Man’s Journey into infertility and IVF and I have to say, I really enjoyed it! First, I want to say how refreshing it was to get the male point of view into the world of infertility and IVF. I’ve been through IVF and of course have shared many conversations with my husband on the subject but it was quite interesting to be inside Michael’s head through his journey. If you’ve ever wondered what your hubby was thinking when he needs to poke you for an injection or when you get moody, then you should pick up this book!

      The other thing I loved was how Michael explained the process. IVF in the UK is quite different from the US and I found it interesting to know what the other side of the world does when it comes to this procedure. For example, instead of Lupron injections to ‘down regulate,’ they use a nasal spray. And of course, there was a lot of tea to mark each occasion! Michael was also kind enough to do some reserach on IVF and FETs and he gives us a mini history lesson on the subject which I thought was enlightening. I also love how he gives us an excellent analogy of sperm moving to the egg by explaining it in human terms: ‘getting to Glasgow from London on foot without feet or legs, getting weaker by the day, and lots of things trying to kill you along the way. Then when you get there, you are exhausted and dying and then you discover you have to break through a wall they built around the city using nothing but your head.’ Now doesn’t that put things into perspective?

       Michael also gave some great advice throughout the book. In one part he writes to all the males out there (regarding your sperm), “Don’t eat rubbish, don’t drink rubbish, don’t put nasty things into your body and make sure you have happy knackers.” He also writes, “I firmly believe the best way to start IVF is to be as relaxed and chilled as possible.” I whole-heartedly agree! Other helpful parts of the book are Michael’s top ten tips, a glossary of medical terms and Internet abbreviations, and a list of resources to check out online all located at the end.

      I thought Test Tubes and Testosterone was really funny. Michael certainly has a wit about him and I’m guessing this sense of humour is what helped him through his infertility. There were many parts I was literally laughing out loud! There are also really touching parts that were sprinkled throughout that I loved. 

       *Spoiler Alert*

     If you’re interested to know if Michael does indeed have success (since some infertility memoirs aren’t wrapped up by the end in a neat little baby bow), then I am happy to report that he does! That’s all I will tell you, although he does announce his daughter Ruby in the opening Author’s Note. You’ll have to read the book to find out more!  

    The only criticism I would give is that I wanted more! More details on the birth of his child(ren) would have been nice especially since he goes into great length about his thoughts on the subject before his wife Hayley even becomes pregnant. I also wanted to know what it is finally like for him to be a father. Although he does sum it up quite nicely in #10 on his tip list: “It can be worth it in the end, believe me.

       Read Test Tubes and Testosterone! It is an interesting read with a rare perspective into an unfamiliar world. You can share it with your significant other and everyone can get a laugh! You can follow Michael on Twitter at @theIVFdad and buy the book here! :-)

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    Friday Friend Link-up ~ Virtual Friends

      So, I’m going to put this post up a day early so you have extra time to link up! If you’re not familiar with what’s going on, it’s Friends Month here on Stress Free Infertility! I would love for you to share the love and write a heart-felt post about one, more than one, or all of your internet buddies, your loyal & supportive followers on Twitter (and FB) and your besties all over the ALI community! Write your hearts out and link up! Don’t forget to link back here so that others can follow along, join in the fun, and read each other’s posts! Thanks! ;-)



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    Virtual Friends Blog Love!

      So the topic this week is Virtual Friends. So what makes a great virtual friend? Well, in my opinion, he/she supports you in every way they can. Perhaps they read and comment often on your blog, or link back to you in their posts, or retweet your tweets.  Maybe they are on Facebook giving you encouragement, or often wishing you luck on Twitter or they are always there for you in the message boards you frequent (which is where I had many virtual friends through my journey). Ultimately they are your cheerleader when you need it the most. There are many things a virtual friend does and perhaps, they don’t even know how much they are appreciated for the little things they do. Well, now’s your chance to tell them. This Friday, I’m having another link-up. Write a post about one or more of your best virtual friends sometime this week, tell them about it, and then link back here. And, SunnyMamma (a wonderful virtual friend who often retweets my posts) has a Sharing Hope link up, so if you are participating in that, you can do both this Friday by writing a post about how your virtual friend offers you hope in one way or another.

    So, here’s my special Blog Love Virtual Friend Post for this week. It was extremely difficult to narrow it down to just 3! I am grateful for all of you! Truly!

       First up, I’m lovin’ Andrea from Life, Love & Pursuit of our Fairytale. She has been such a great friend supporting me on this blog. She was one of the first to subscribe to my RSS feed and religiously comments on my posts with such thoughtful and encouraging words. In fact, I recently gave her an award for being my top commenter! She has also offered to share her success story and write a guest blog post, hopefully coming soon. Thank you Andrea for being there for me! I appreciate it so much! ;-)

      Next up is Rebecca from The Road Less Traveled. Rebecca has also commented quite a bit on my blog with such kind hearted support. Also, she has shared her success story when she got pregnant, but sadly lost her daughter Lily. She now has her son Ian and I hope she will give us another success story when she can. Her blog posts are thoughtful (I love how she adds a quote or links to a song) and her strength is amazing! She is like a pillar of hope and encouragement! Thank you Rebecca!

      And last but not least is Keiko from Hannah Wept, Sarah Laughed. She is someone who not only supports me through retweets and link-ups but she often features my posts in her Infertility Insights Daily e-newspaper! I also love how much she inspires me to be better and strive for more. She’s incredibly creative (have you seen her What IF? award winning video?) and she’s also a wonderful infertility advocate which is really quite admirable as she is still in the midst of her plight. Thank you Keiko for being such a strong voice in our community!

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    Virtual Hugger Award!

     

    PhotobucketSo, for my Blog Love post, I decided to create an award for my top commenters! They, after all, have been great cyber friends giving so many virtual hugs! I have never met these bloggers in person, but they are out there, tirelessly supporting me and many others I’m sure. They have BIG hearts and I appreciate it so much! So, here are the rules!

      Virtual Hugger Award Rules:

    1. Thank the person who gave it to you (and link back)
    2. Give 3 Reasons why you LOVE comments and want them to keep on coming!
    3. Award your top 10 commenters and tell them they won the award! (*Most blogger software has widgets/plugins that can figure out who they are!)

    OK! I LOVE comments because they:

    1. Make my day!
    2. Remind me that my blog is important to others
    3. Help me to meet and support other bloggers on their journey

    Here are my top 10 commenters:

    1. Andrea from Life, Love & Persuit of Our Fairy Tale
    2. Tara from Me Plus One
    3. Hannah from Hannah & Sam
    4. Rebecca from The Road Less Traveled
    5. Christina from The Subfertile Frugalista
    6. Aly from The Infertility Overachievers
    7. Kristin from Dragondremer’s Lair
    8. Ashley from Stealing Baby Kisses
    9. Junebug from Junebug’s Musings
    10. Holly from Ready to Be a Mom

    Thank you to all my commenters! And keep on spreading the love! ;-)

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    Happy Father’s Day!

      So I wanted to take the time out to honor all the dads out there and even the dads-to-be (whether it be in the near future or a bit longer), especially Alec Ross blogger at I Want To Be a Daddy who is celebrating his very first Father’s Day today! He was a co-host in the recent Twitterview! In case you missed it, go here for the transcript.

     The IF community is largely populated by women but there are the occassional male voices out there! I applaud them for their efforts to be heard in a world that is so misunderstood. If you’d like to hear more male perspective, here’s some links to some posts my hubby helped me out with last year all about his point of view of our journey. (Male P.O.V.,  Male P.O.V Part 2, Male P.O.V Part 3) We worked so hard to be parents, I am most proud of him today. This is his 4th Father’s Day and it is still hard to believe we have 3 miracles to celebrate this day that is so special! I love you babe! You are an amazing father! ;-)

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    Awards!

    So, I just recently got two lovely awards and I am so incredibly honored!  (And, I decided to combine them into one post!) ;-)

    OK, so first Disheartened at Will You Knock Me Up Tonight gave me the Versatile Blogger Award! Thanks! It means a lot to me that I inspire you! So the rules are: you are to grab the award, link back to the person who gave it to you, share 10 things about yourself, nominate 15 recently discovered blogs, and let them know you awarded them…so since it’s ICLW week, I will start off with things about me:

    1. Every day, I know I am blessed and fully appreciate being a mom to 3 incredible miracles and I will never take that for granted.
    2. I am a teacher. I have taught 6th, 5th, 2nd and now 1st grade.
    3. I am a twin. My identical twin sister never had any trouble getting pregnant which was a heavy burden for me since we shared everything in life except this experience.
    4. I’m a capricorn which means I’m quite determined. If I set myself to do something, it gets done (usually).
    5. I live in NY (just an hour outside of the city) on Long Island.
    6. I lived in Colorado for a year and loved the mountains there! So majestic!
    7. I LOVE all kinds of pasta!
    8. Every single episode of Friends makes me laugh, even the re-runs that I’ve watched a dozen times.
    9. I would love to see how other cultures live on the other side of the world and travel to many distant lands.
    10. My husband and I will be married for 8 wonderful years this July and he still makes me smile everyday.

    Here’s that list (in no particular order) of very recently discovered blogs ALL participating in ICLW:

    1. The blogger at Dealing With Dorr
    2. Alec at I Want to be a Daddy
    3. Krista at Diary of taking small steps to baby steps
    4. S at Misconception About Conception
    5. Sara at empty whole
    6. marilyn from Trying to Conceive
    7. Tippy from Tippy & Tidy’s Tumultuous Trip to Toddlers
    8. Kat from I’m Very Far Away
    9. Sarah from Bio Girl
    10. lostintranslation from We say IVF they say FIV
    11. angela and david from a toddler, a triathlete, and an entrepreneur
    12. baby steps from Baby Steps to Motherhood
    13. Marianne from The Daily Miracle
    14. Carmela from The One in Eight Couple
    15. SJ from sunshine on jupitor

    Now, Keiko at Hannah Wept, Sarah Laughed gave me the Stylish Blogger Award! Thanks Keiko! I feel so stylish and you really are awesome and a true inspiration to me! ) ;-) So these rules are, I am supposed to snatch the image, link back to the person who gave it to me, share 7 things about myself, award 15 other bloggers and contact them so they know they’ve won. So this time, my list will be all about infertility.

    1. Being an infertility advocate is a real passion of mine. I make the time for it because it means a lot to me to be able to help others through such a difficult disease.
    2. I hope to continue to advocate for this disease for a long time to come.
    3. I hope one day insurance companies will cover any treatment that is needed for all patients.
    4. I hope in one way or another, every person affected with infertility has the child they long for.
    5. I hope more research can be done so we can all become more aware of answers to infertility problems and be able to fix them.
    6. I hope one day the fertile world becomes more aware of what infertile couples go through so they can be more supportive.
    7. I hope one day we all can speak up about our infertility and not feel ashamed, lost, or alone.

    Here are the blogs I chose: (*straight off the ICLW list in no particular order!)

    1. daega99 from Are We There Yet
    2. Tillie from a nuttier life
    3. Rebecca from The Road Less Traveled (even though I know she won it already)
    4. Jenna from Among the Blossoms
    5. Lisa Marsh from Your Great Life
    6. Whitney from Whitney and Erick
    7. Jess at A Greater Yes
    8. Mrs. Bushey from The Bushey Life
    9. Maria from Mission: Fertile Soul
    10. Lu at The Inadequate Conception
    11. Kate from Busted Plumbing
    12. Aly from The Infertility Overachievers
    13. Jasmine from My Hopeful Journey
    14. Ashlee G. from Savor the Moment
    15. cainml from Raising Cain (someday)
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