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Experiences

January ICLW Welcome!

Hello all! It’s one of my favorite times of the month because it’s ICLW time again. In case you don’t know about ICLW, check it out here. It’s also a great time for me here at Stress Free Infertility because I recently celebrated my 2 year Blogiversary and I’m very proud of how much this blog has grown in the last two years. And, I’m most excited about my memoir, Ordinary Miracles, which is nearly finished and will be out to the public within the next couple of months! And, in case you missed it in my last post, I was recently awarded Editor’s Choice recognition by my publishing company and I am so very honored!

Here’s a little bit about me in case this is your first time here. I went through 6 IVF cycles (3 fresh and 3 frozen) over a 3 year span and I now have an almost 5  year old daughter and 2 year old boy/girl twins. I teach 1st grade full time and I live in NY, on Long Island with my husband, my three miracles, and my boxer Toby. I decided to write this blog (and my memoir) to help others through their infertility journey. This blog is also on Facebook and Twitter (and I would LOVE some more followers and friends there!) I will also be creating a website for my book and keep you all posted on that as well.

I am now working on my next book which will be a collection of success stories, stress free techniques that worked, and advice from those who’ve been there. I usually post stories on Sunday (but I don’t have a new one to post today). If you’ve been successful and would like to share your story here and in my new book, go to Calling All Success Stories to get the Q & A format I use. If you’d like to read stories I’ve already featured, go to Success Stories.

It’s a new year, here’s a recycled post to keep you focused: Get Your Zzzzs! And, we’ve had some snow this past weekend here in NY. If you’re experiencing cold weather near you, here’s a recycled post about keeping warm: Hydrate Your Body, Warm Your Belly.

Thanks so much for stopping by! ;-)

Happy January ICLW!

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Promises and opportunities…

Ok, so I know I promised a blog love post tonight. It’s been a while since I had one and I apologize. But, I have exciting news and an opportunity I just can’t ignore right now. I recently received Editor’s Choice recognition with my publishing company for my memoir which I was told only goes to about 5 or 6 authors out of 7,000 each year. WOW! I was really surprised and humbled to get that news! So, now I am in the running for the Rising Star program and there’s lots of questions I need to tackle and focus on. I will keep you all posted on this very amazing opportunity! Thanks for understanding!

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2 Year Blogaversary!

  Hello everone! I am so excited today because it is my 2 year blogaversary! That’s right, I’ve been writing here at Stress Free Infertility for 2 years now. So much has happened in the last 2 years, I wanted to share a bit with you.

  In my life, my first IVF miracle is now 4 1/2 years old! She is so amazing and bright. I especially love how she hugs and kisses me daily and says how much she loves me! So precious. And my FET miracle twins, Mia and Logan are now 2 years old. When I first started writing this blog, they were only a couple months and boy were things a little hectic. Times are still a bit harried but there’s so much more activity from everyone around! They both just started saying “love you!” and it melts my heart each time! And in the last 2 years, I reached a personal goal of finishing my memoir that chronicles my journey through primary and secondary infertility! It is now in the final stages of being self published and I am so thrilled!

  In the last 2 years on the Internet, I have met so many courageous men and women pouring out their hearts and persevering through the trials of infertility. I am honored to be apart of such a tenacious group whom are so supportive. I have also met so many professionals and groups whom help out this IF community. If this is your first time here through ICLW, check out my amazing list of blogs that has grown considerably in the last 2 years. I now have 246+ infertility blogs listed and 39 infertility resources/websites. But what is pretty amazing is the 152 infertility blogs that have been successful through IF. (Most of them at one time were once on my other list.) That in itself should give you some hope. If you’re not on any of my lists, let me know, and I will of course add you on! ;-)

Happy ICLW! And a very Happy Holiday to all!

Psst..check out my giveaway from InJewels if you haven’t yet entered! They are letting you choose your favorite piece!

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Godspell ~ A Review

  So, I recently had the pleasure of an invite to see Godspell which opened on Broadway in NYC on Monday. It was originally an off-Broadway production from the 1970′s and has been revised and completely modernized with references to the Macarena, Facebook, Steve Jobs, and even Lindsay Lohan, among others.  

  First I want to mention how much I loved the intimate setting of the Circle in the Square Theatre. There really wasn’t a bad seat! And although seemingly low budget with very little props, and scenary,  I really enjoyed how the cast used the entire theatre during the show (up and down the aisles, standing on top of the scaffolding staircase, etc.). I also really loved the placement of the guitar players among the audience. There was a musician just two rows in front of my husband and I. And I thought it was quite unique to have a stage that they manipulated with water and trampolines from underneath.

  The songs were all upbeat, and the costumes were casual and a bit comedic, but there were some tender moments and really dramatic scenes that caught me by surprise (like the crucifixion). And, I was quite impressed with the vocal talent of the cast. Well done! All in all, I had a lot of fun watching Jesus and his apostles go through the teachings of the bible with a modern twist.  We’re all going through infertility “Day by Day” and I know that faith is truly an important piece of that twisted and confusing puzzle. This is a feel good show that is sure to give you some stress free hours which is something I know you would all appreciate!

So, if you’re in the NY area, there is an exclusive discount I can offer you through this blog post. With the code, GSPRD719, you can get tickets as low as $79.50 (regular price $125). Here is a direct link to that discount: http://tinyurl.com/GodspellBloggerDiscount Prepare ye the way of the Lord!”

Also, there is an amazing Mexican restaurant with phenominal food right in the area that I absolutely recommend. It’s called Toloache. It’s a bit pricey, (like the $15 bowl of their specialty quacamole) but totally worth it!

  In closing, here’s a great montage video I found from the show! Check it out! ;-)

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Winning the War

I’m recycling this post from last year! Thank you to all who have served!  

Today, on Veteran’s Day, I’m not only reminded of all those that have fought in a war to help others, I’m also thinking of all those that are battling infertility around the world.

   Throughout my struggle, there were many times I felt like I was on the front lines, arming myself with ammunition (injections) and intelligence (as much information as possible) that would help me get through. And often times, even with the best soldiers and generals on my side using the best war tactics they knew how,  I lost the battle. Some of those battles were harder to get through, grieve over and move on from than others. And, I have the battle wounds to prove it. You may never be able to see them, but they are there. Infertility has wounded my heart and left scars on my soul.

  But, even with all the losses, ultimately, I have won the war! Infertility made me feel broken but it never truly broke my spirit and I have come out the other side victorious!

  And you can too.

  Whether you achieve success through a miracle pregnancy, an infertility treatment or surrogacy, adoption or ultimately choosing to be child free, you can beat infertility and the war it can wage on your body and mind. This Veteran’s Day while you remember those that fought for their lives to help others, remember all that you are doing to fight for the lives of your future children. It will never go in vain.

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My video response!

   Do you remember last week when I mentioned the incredible campaign that Redbook and Resolve were hosting? (You can read The Truth About Trying post to learn more about it!) Well they would like you to post a video to share your truth about trying and tell everyone what you wish you had known. So after many takes, (finding quiet time in my house with three kids 4 and under isn’t easy!) and trying to figure out how to best upload my video, I finally got one I thought was response worthy and uploaded it! I stumble a bit through it but I thought this one sounded the most natural. Anyway, here it is…


Now I hope you will share your own! It really can be so liberating to open up and share your thoughts. So speak up! ;-)

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Guest Blogger: What PCOS Has Done For Me

  This post is written by a guest blogger April from Where Do We Go From Here? Thank you so much April for sharing this awesome post with us! ;-)
 
Being diagnosed with PCOS was one thing that completely undermined just about everything I’d ever been taught or believed. Who wasn’t been told over and over as a child that they could be whatever they wanted to be when they grew up? When you hear the same thing often enough, you start to believe it. When you keep hearing it, it only reinforces that belief. What do you do when someone pulls that rug out from under you?
The doctor who initially made my diagnosis didn’t really seem to be interested in explaining anything further to me. It was ‘yup, PCOS, take your birth control until you want a baby.’ It wasn’t until I got home and started reading everything I could find on the Internet that my heart really started sinking. But really, it all made sense. Things I never would have connected were suddenly so obviously related. Things I’d never even worried about before were booted to the forefront of my mind.
But none of those things were the real problem. All I’d ever wanted to be was a wife and a mother.  This doctor, with his insultingly superior assumption that I couldn’t spell ‘polycystic ovarian syndrome,’ had so easily dismissed half of my life’s goals.
 I went through a period of time where I had no hope for anything anymore. I hated the fact that I took birth control pills for eleven years before finding someone I was ready to have children with. I hated the fact that I never wondered why I never had pregnancy scares like everyone else. I hated myself for never suspecting that anything was wrong. I hated that almost all of my friends already had kids. I hated that I might be sentencing my husband to be childless without even asking him. Most of all, I hated what my body had done to me. I hated how it had let me down.

It’s been over five years since I saw that doctor. I’ve lost count of how many others I’ve seen since then. But the biggest difference hasn’t come from them. It’s come from me, and how my outlook has changed. I have my good days and my worse days, like anyone else, but I know that the worse days won’t break me. I haven’t reached the bottom of this pit yet, but I’ve imagined what it looks like, and it isn’t as bad as it could be. I know that PCOS and infertility are not the worst things that can happen, at least to me. I haven’t given up. I’ve really only just gotten started trying all the options that I’m open to trying. No matter what happens, I have learned that I am the strong person that people have told me I am. So not everything I’ve always been told has turned out to be a lie. Some of it has turned out to be more true than I would ever have believed. And that’s pretty encouraging.

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Today in Retrospect

This is a post I wrote last year with a few adaptations…

Three years ago today, I just had an FET the day before and was quite vulnerable since we recently had an unexpected chemical pregnancy from a fresh IVF.  But I was also hopeful because we made the drastic decision to put 3 embryos back in (as opposed to putting the usual 2 back in on the past 4 cycles) and we were confident at least one would stick and we’d give our daughter (our first IVF miracle) a sibling.  Eleven days later, we got the devastating news that none of our embryos made it. That cycle was negative as all other cycles had been that year. More down than I had ever been through my infertility, I decided to take a much needed break…all the while wondering if I would ever be a mom to more than one child….

  Two years ago I was in the hospital at this time, overwhelmed with emotion from the birth of my twins and juggling the very precarious situation of breast feeding these tiny newborns! My heart grew so much bigger and I haven’t been the same since.  I have never felt such a leap of love ever in my life as I had that day. My miracle twins were born (via an FET that followed the above mentioned 3 month break) and they completed my family. I never knew life could be so unexpected, so incredibly fulfilling. I knew I was truly blessed.

   This year, I’m about to put my 3 miracles down to bed…and as they snuggle with stuffies and dream about tomorrow, I am amazed at how much they’ve all grown. My twins turned 2 years old today and they still amaze me everyday. I still feel truly blessed. And mostly I am fully aware that had it not been for my infertility, I would not be the person I am today, a mommy of 3, or a writer of this blog…which takes me to the reason for this post…

  Sometimes you never know where a dream can take you, or how much can happen in a year, or what direction your life will go. Hold on to the belief that you will find fulfillment in one way or another. Keep hope alive, believe in miracles and someday, you will wake up to a reality that may even turn out better than your dreams.

Happy Birthday Mia and Logan!
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PCOS Success & Remembering 9/11

  I was just reading over at Keiko’s blog and she had a post I wanted to link to for Success Story Sunday. Keiko is doing a weekly “Voices of PCOS” and her first story last week was Kristin’s who blogs at Once a Mother. In her story, she details her battle with PCOS and how she adopted a low Glycemic diet (per the advice of her RE) to help in her IVF cycle. It worked and she now has adorable 6 month old twins! Check out her story to get many helpful tips (that I think I am going to look into as well) and her blog to see the cutest babies! Thanks Keiko for sharing these stories! And congratulations Kristin! ;-)

***

  Today, of course, as many of you are remembering in your own way, is a day we will never forget. We probably all remember where we were, what we were doing and how much this day, 10 years ago, changed our lives forever.

 I had just moved to Colorado and children were a blip in my future dreams as I was months away from even getting engaged. I was trying to gain some independence and job experience half way across the country but I was home sick and longing to be back in NY. When September 11th unfolded, I felt lost and afraid. I wanted to cling to my family, my friends and my future hubby but they were so far away. I didn’t know what the world would be like, how many more attacks would take place, or how much war would be in our future and that unknown was a scary place to think about when moving forward with planning a wedding and eventually children. But, I planned, moved on, and felt whole again. I felt proud to be an American and especially a New Yorker.

  Now, 10 years later, back in New York in my second home with my three children nestled in bed and my boxer snoring next to me, we’re like a typical American family complete with a white picket fence in the suburbs. Today, we remembered that day and what was lost but especially what we gained as a country. My kids are too young to understand, but some day, they will remember with us and share the stories with their own children. We will never forget.

   I’m closing with a picture I took of my hubby (future fiance at the time) as we crossed into NJ on our cross country trip to move me out west. It was taken in August of 2001 with such innocence. I was just trying to get one last shot of the beloved city. I developed my pictures a few days after September 11th and this was the first picture on top of my pile.  It stopped me in my tracks and I remember gasping in disbelief. This is a very precious picture for us today.

My thoughts and prayers are with all those who lost loved ones 10 years ago today. They are all heroes.

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Power with Friends!

  So as many of you are aware, Hurricane Irene ravaged through much of the east coast of the US and hit Long Island yesterday. It left me this little present in my driveway and I am now without power.

But I wanted to send a shout out to all my friends who were in the path of Irene and hope that you are safe and sound. Sometimes it takes a crazy storm to help you appreciate life and all that you have.

Thanks to all my friends out here in computer land, blogging world and twitterville! I also wanted to say how much I appreciate all of you who took my poll, shared my survey with family and friends, and linked up and shared posts about friends in real life, virtual friends and furry friends! I may be without power, but I am empowered by all of you who have supported me and continue to support all in the ALI community!  ;-)

  That’ll probably be all the blogging I can do for Friends Month

I’ll write more when I can!

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