When you’re going through infertility, the holidays can be very painful. I know first hand what it’s like to see all the toy commercials, receive all the baby photo cards from family and friends, and feel so empty inside when you don’t have little ones to share your holiday traditions with.
While filling the void isn’t easy, you can distract yourself just enough so that you can still enjoy the holidays whether you spend them with family and friends (with or without children) or alone. I have written some ways to help.
Way #10: Rule out the perfect gift. This is not the least important. In fact it is probably the most crucial way to stay focused on jolly music, twinkling lights and yummy egg-nog. And that’s why it is definitely worth mentioning first.
We all know that the perfect gift is what you’ve wanted for a VERY long time and what you’ve been working so hard to get (whether it has been through diligent yet unsuccessful tries at home, or through researching ways to improve your chances or going through IUI or IVF one after another.)
We also know that the perfect gift won’t be sitting there under your tree (or menorah) wrapped up in a pretty bow, the timing is just not there. And if you are in the midst of a cycle, expecting news any day now, DO NOT associate your news with having the best holiday! You must separate the two. You will be that much happier if you do indeed get the news you were hoping for and won’t be as disappointed if you don’t. Let’s be honest here, any negative news does have the potential of ruining your holiday. But you have the power to not let it! If you don’t get the “perfect” gift you were hoping for this year, it’ ok. By next holiday, you may be surprised at who may join you under that tree!
*Two Christmases ago, I was devastated at trying all year for another baby unsuccessfully. I tried to make it special for my daughter but a nagging feeling consumed me. This year, my family is nothing like I imagined it would be from last year. My twins will celebrate their third holiday and my daughter will have her fifth. You just never know what’s in store for you in the future. Keep your spirits high and be merry and bright to the possibilities out there! *
